The Retired Seeker

I don’t know that it’s possible for a lifelong seeker to retire from seeking.  I continue to read something inspiring (to me) almost daily.  It’s almost like an addiction.  At least I have narrowed down the Search nowadays.  I’ve narrowed it down to nonduality writers, who are the ones who talk about ending the seeking but then write the books so you can continue the Search.

So I have come to realize that the Search may not continue in the same way for me.  I no longer have a conceptualized path that I am continually trying to  work my way “up” by accumulating knowledge from every sage (ancient and current) who claim to know the way.  Instead, the Search has taken a different form.

There may be no path, no particular sage and no hidden knowledge to search for and that is the end of the traditional Search that is referred to in the nondual writings.  However, another Search has started now (if it can be called a Search) and that is the understanding of direct experience. That would be to stop seeking through second-hand experiences and begin to look for my own direct experience.  At this point, though, my direct experience doesn’t seem at all as interesting or as magical as the people who write about their awakening experiences.